I have been so busy lately that I have not had time to think about posting. It is supposed to be my summer vacation, but I am hosting my visiting parents, going to an education conference in Atlanta, babysitting a 12 year old and a 5 year old (my mom had three kids, I don’t know how she managed it), and getting prepared to sell my artism at the Puyallup, WA Farmer’s Market. I have not even had time to think about planning my lessons for next year. That is extremely important because I am teaching two subjects I have never taught before. I will start that after I take my niece on her sixth grade graduation trip that I promised her.
But I suppose all that is beside the point. I have had time to look up some simply crazy warning labels that are posted on honest to goodness real products. I know the one on the Dremel Drill is real because I just bought one. As clear as day in the warning section it says “this product is not to be used as a dental drill or for any other medical purposes.” I wonder just what lawsuit caused the company to put that warning label on their products. It’s a crazy world out there. Here are some more real life product warning labels.
Ignite lighter away from face.
This product must be cooked before eating.
Swanson TV Dinners
Warning: Contents under pressure. Cap may blow off causing eye or other serious injury. Point away from face and people, especially while opening.
Canada Dry Club Soda
If pregnant or breast-feeding, ask a health professional before use.
Directions: Use like regular soap.
(On the side of the cup) “This ice may be cold”
Slush Puppy Cup
On bottom side: “Keep Upright”.
Tesco Fruit Juice Carton
This broom does not actually fly.
Harry Potter Toy Broom
To prevent possible injury, do not apply the hose or the lid sealer to any part of the body while vacuum pump is in operation.
Foodsealer (Vacuum seals foods)
CAUTION: Contains cleaning agents. Do not treat garment while wearing.
Caution: Risk of fire
Pine Mountain Fire Logs
Warning: While cooking be sure to place crust side down
Red Barron Pizza
Luke Burbank of TBTL (Too Beautiful to Live 97.3 KIRO FM in Seattle, WA) fame has a great story about his mother actually doing this to him one Sunday morning before church. She burnt his ear but no one sued. Talk about missing an opportunity.